This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize
