do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
