gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
