Dual....:-)
Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Panties = found
Randomize
