she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Randomize