i don't want you to think of me as your TA
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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