I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
