I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
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