On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
is it fun? or sober?
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
