I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
