walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
