you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Randomize
