lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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