New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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