Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Randomize
