He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
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