She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
