I can't watch pbs sober anymore
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
