just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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