Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Randomize
