I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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