She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
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