Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
