So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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