You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Randomize