I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
