Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
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