i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
