I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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