I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Randomize
