The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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