is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
