The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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