Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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