I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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