Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize
