Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
