you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
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