Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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