No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
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