Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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