..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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