I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
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