After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Randomize
