is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Come on in and take your pants off
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