Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
