I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
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