So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
