where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Randomize
