and you said cock pushups were impossible
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize
